Thursday, July 15, 2010

The Lone Wolf

This girl is our oldest.  Our most responsible.  Our most mature.  *cough* *cough* *sputter*.  Yeah, there's just no saying that with a straight face.  She is our oldest though, at the ripe old age of 21.  She's a full time college student who also has a part time job, which I guess makes her a little responsible.  But mature? Yeah, you can forget about that. 

I met this girl when she was 11.  She was a quiet and shy little thing compared to her dramatically inclined younger sister (GG).  In fact, I felt kinda bad for her.  I took it upon myself to befriend this sweet thing, and she hasn't shut up since.  Seriously, once you get this girl out of the bottle, there's no putting that genie back!

Like GG, I have also known this girl 10 years (did I really say 10 years? Can it really be 10 years? Someone pinch me, I swear it can't have been that long).  

Reasons why I dislike this one:
  1. She never really liked school.  And I loved school.  Which meant it was my sole goal in life to make her love school.  Remind me sometime to tell you about the time she tried to change her grades not knowing I'd already called the school.  Uh huh. You heard me.
  2. She "pretends" not to know people like Marie Osmond to make me feel old.  Seriously, this should be grounds for immediate dismissal.
  3. She sings off key (completely tone def this one), and knows all the words to pretty much every Disney and Veggie Tales movie there is.
  4. She sings every Disney and Veggie Tales song she knows very loudly/badly in the car when there's no place for me to escape.  She does it on purpose.
  5. She does this thing we call "snuffling" which sounds like a little puppy sniffing in your ear.  It's very annoying.  She does this all the time.  Even when I threaten her with bodily harm.
  6. She laughs when I threaten her with bodily harm.
  7. She's all muscle, and I'm fat and jiggly.
  8. She pokes my fat, jiggly tummy and then likes to show off her flat, never had a baby, 21 year old tummy.
  9. She tans.  Now mind you, she has to get a horrible painful burn first, which I do like,  but it fades into a beautiful tan when it's done.  I just go from white, to red to white.  There is no tan.  I'm bitter.
  10. She always wants to hug me.  In public.  Where people can see.  She doesn't care about my evil step-monster rep.
She is a funny girl though.  She's a total athletic tom boy.  She lettered in high school for water polo.

 She was the goalie.  She was the goalie because she was lazy and didn't want to move around the whole pool.  It was okay for her to be lazy, because from her goal, she was strong enough to score against the other team in one throw.  But for all her tom-boy tendancies, she sure does clean up nice when she wants to.

and here

These are a little old, but she doesn't dress up very often, so we have to take what we can get.

Now, we're going to call her "Lone Wolf".  And not because she loves wolves, which she does, but because she thinks she's a loner.  A solitary figure cloaked in darkness and intrigue.  A break out of the crowd, do her own thing, everyone be-damned, Lone Wolf.  She's not of course.  This girl wouldn't know what to do with herself if she had to spend more than 5 minutes alone.  I think she might be as bored and annoyed with herself as the rest of us are.  So in my head at least, I'm going to call her the "Lone Wolf Wannabe".  And from here on out, when I refer to her as my Lone Wolf or LW.. you can add the Wannabe part in your head too.  It will be our little secret.  Tee Hee!

Seriously.. Thoughts?

1 comment:

  1. Well you're wrong about one thing. I could tell you exactly what she would do if she had to spend more than 5 minutes alone and had no homework, chores, or work-related things that needed to be done. One of three things: Find some game to play (either on her computer or one of her gaming systems), text/call somebody, or find something to watch on CMT or Sci-fi (most likely CMT, and most likely something like "The Singing Bee" so she can sing her favorite country songs in or out of tune whether you can hear her from Altadena or not xP)